This Nigerian Lady Failed WAEC 5 Times; Today She’s A Graduate With First Class!

If you work hard rather than expecting miracle to marry a rich man or rich woman, soon you will overtake even those you are looking up to.

Read the story of Alaboh Anthonia who sat for WAEC 6 times, today she’s DELSU first class graduate: 27yrs old Anthonia is the second best graduate from Delta State University, Abraka, in the 2014/2015 academic session, and she graduated from the Department of Mathematics with 4.70 CGPA. She shares her experience with Punch’s Tunde Ajaja.

How was your growing up?
My growing up wasn’t easy at all. I was nine years old when my parents divorced, so as the first of three children, I had to assume the role of a mother for my siblings. There were lots of challenges but I’m grateful to God for my dad and everyone who assisted in making us who we are today. Coping with numerous house chores, balancing that with my academics and having to do the things I wasn’t used to before were all very stressful for me as a child but I thank God who saw me through. My dad was also very supportive, even though he lost his job about that time too, we managed. My teen pastor in church also used to counsel me.

Did it affect your performance in school?
Not really, even though I won’t rule out the psychological effect of seeing my parents separate. But overall, I didn’t do badly. In my secondary school, I was doing well but my position in the class was like 21 out of 50. I wasn’t so much an excellent student then.
How easy was it passing your WASSCE and UTME and how many sittings?
JAMB was not a challenge for me but when I first wrote the WAEC, I had just two credits; Mathematics and English while I failed the rest. I don’t know why it happened that way. I kept writing the exam until I had my papers in one sitting at the sixth attempt. I finished from secondary school in 2002, but I didn’t pass all my papers at once until 2008. I could have combined results but I didn’t want that, so, I kept trying till I had it all at one sitting. That’s why I thank God for having someone like my father because he understood what I wanted and supported me. He has always been very supportive of our academics and I’ll always be grateful to him. He didn’t despise me because I didn’t have my papers at once. He encouraged me and stood by me. I later got admission in 2010.

As a child and in the midst of all that happened, what did you dream to become?
My dream was to be a lawyer and human rights activist so I could fight against the military government. But, as time went on and democratic government was in place, my love for science, especially mathematics, grew. So, my dream changed to being either a computer scientist or a teacher. So, I chose to study mathematics and my dad was supportive. He was happy that I chose teaching, and he suggested I could settle for being a lecturer instead.



How easy was it to have a first class?
Having a first class wasn’t easy at all; it involves discipline, determination, sacrifices, above all, God’s grace, mercy and favour. I never thought I would graduate with a first class, not to talk of being the second best in the school, but after seeing my 100L result, I had 4.33 and I felt I could put in more effort and have a better result. When I got to school, I planned not to go to parties or the beach. I didn’t venture into things that could waste my time, I had a concrete and workable plan for each day, I decided to start reading as soon as lectures began and I tried to have foreknowledge of my courses by studying ahead. I also had friends who had first class and I learnt from them. When I had 4.33 in 100L first semester, I was happy but the people I told encouraged me that with more effort, I could make first class. My friends believed in me and they told me I needed to do more. They told me the benefits of having a first class and that the opportunities awaiting first class were enormous, including job offer and scholarship. They said Delta State Government used to give its indigent first class graduates N5m, but that was then. However, without those things, I still have joy that I achieved it. I started having first class in 200L. I had 5.0 in my first semester and 4.85 in second semester. Since then, I had to maintain it.

What was your typical day like as an undergraduate?
I was either in the hostel, in the class receiving lectures, in the fellowship or sometimes in the library. I had a timetable for reading and my standard duration was six hours, two hours each during the day, in the evening and in the midnight. Naturally, I don’t sleep for long. In the night, I might wake twice or thrice so it was an advantage for me. Initially, I never liked the idea of going to the library to read, as time and courses grew tough, I started using the library because I needed to use some textbooks. Gradually, I became addicted to the library.

Were you involved in other school activities?
Yes, I was involved mostly in the fellowship as a chorister. I was in different units in the fellowship, including prayer, evangelism, home cell and academic unit. I was the director in 400l, I was among the committee that organised the first national mathematics conference hosted by our school as the exhibition coordinator.

What was your most memorable moment in school?
My happiest moment was when our former head of department shook my hand in 100L. I went to the department to check my result and when the person in charge was calling my grades and there were many As (distinctions), the HOD was in his office, so when he heard someone having As, he came out to see who had such an impressive result. He shook my hand and congratulated me. That was the first time I would be having a close contact with him and he was someone I looked up to because I heard he also had a first class, so I wanted to be like him and I’m happy I achieved that.What are your aspirations?
I would like to further my education till I become a professor in applied mathematics, have my PGD in education, learn one or two programmes and establish my own school. I have always loved teaching and I found that I have joy imparting knowledge in others. I intend to change people’s perspective towards mathematics especially students in primary and secondary school. I like them to know that mathematics is easy.What is your advice to students?
My advice is that they should be determined, live a purposeful life because today’s input determines tomorrow’s output. They should believe in themselves, think big, don’t assume they know certain things; they should be sure they know, and above all, know God.

The 50 Best Marriage Tips of All Ages.

The Marriage Counseling Forum has share their best marriage advice.

Marriage Counseling Forum,  have asked other Experts to share their knowledge about best marriage advice. Here are what they have to say, about the 50 best marriage tips ever.

1. If your goal is to have a satisfying marriage with longevity, make sure you are accountable for the part you play in the relationship — good or bad. When you are in denial about your part in the relationship then you are no better than a child flinging sand at another child in a sandbox. When you take responsibility for your part in the marriage, only then will you be able to connect with your partner in a mature, intimate way. - Carin Goldstein, LMFT 

2. Research consistently shows that touching more creates a stronger bond by releasing oxytocin. Hold hands, rub shoulders, hug, kiss, give high-fives or even fist-bumps or bottom pats. When you give a quick hug or kiss, try to lengthen it to at least 5 or 10 seconds for more effective results! - Lori Lowe, MA

3. Learn how to agree to disagree. No two people agree on everything, and that's okay, but it's important to be okay with each other's differences. - Lee Bowers, LP, PhD

4. Sometimes it's not about the amount of money you spend on a gift; it's about the thought that goes into something. Take the time to write a thoughtful note every so often saying what you love and appreciate about him/her. Drop it in his/her briefcase or purse so he/she will find it unexpectedly and it will brighten up his/her day. - Suzanne K. Oshima, Dating Coach

5. For men, it's important to understand that women want to be listened to. Men don't need to solve or fix everything; listening itself is an exceptional gift. For women, it's important to understand that men need time for themselves. By giving him space to pull away and not taking it personally, you allow him to reconnect with his desire for you and his commitment to the relationship. - MarsVenus Coaching, Life Coach

6. The biggest waste of effort in a marriage is trying to change your spouse, since the problems you have with your spouse are generally problems you have in yourself. When you try to change your spouse you come across as a nag and wind up sending the message that 'who you are is not enough.' Nobody likes getting that message, and it leads to distance and polarization. Let your spouse be who he or she is and focus on changing yourself. - Dr. Rick Kirschner, Relationship Coach

7. See problems — boredom in the bedroom, lack of conversations, resentment — as symptoms and treat those symptoms just as you would treat a chronic illness that seemingly has no cure. Throw at it every possible remedy you've got, no matter how alternative or weird it seems. Chances are one or more of them will actually work and your marriage will get stronger and stronger. - Alisa Bowman, Relationship Coach

8. Next time you argue with your partner, drop the shaming, blaming, needing to be right, and really listen without interrupting. Then communicate how you feel, using "I" statements. It's not your partner's job to read your mind, guess what you're thinking, or put words into your mouth. These are huge obstacles to open, honest communication and will guarantee resentment, anger, and frustration in the relationship. - Sharon Rivkin, MA, MFT

9. In order to strengthen your marriage, learn to recognize that most arguments have shared responsibility, that both people have valid points and valid reasons for their feelings.- Kathy Morelli, LPC

10. Fair is not a four letter word. You may have forgotten about fairness, but now's the time to bring it back into your relationship. Are you both being fair when it comes to divvying up chores, communicating your needs, expressing dissatisfaction, dealing with finances, parenting, and supporting one another? If not, how can you improve and bring fairness back to the relationship? - Lisa Steadman, Dating and Relationship Coach 

11. Nothing is more important in a marriage than the relationship between husband and wife. When other things become more important, such as careers, children, and personal pursuits, trouble sets in. Make the relationship your top priority. When you do, the marriage flourishes. - Cathy Meyer, CPC, MCC 

12. Are you creating more pleasurable interactions in your marriage or are you making it painful or unpleasant for your spouse? If your spouse treats you with kindness, gentleness, patience and self-control, it's easy for you to respond kindly. If you are treated badly, with anger, impatience, etc., it's difficult to be nice in return. Focus on how you can be a blessing to your spouse and, in turn, you will be blessed and so will your marriage. - Mack Har

13. Never begin a sentence with the word 'you'. Instead start with the word "I" and then share your feelings instead of your thoughts. This is not as easy as it sounds because we all disguise a lot of thoughts as feelings, as in "I feel like you are avoiding me." Genuine feelings are sad, angry, happy, lonely, frustrated, etc ... and sharing your core feelings creates better communication, and more connection and compassion. - Veronica Monet, ACS, CAM

14. Change your focus to one of learning to appreciate your partner. - Michelle Poll, CPC, MA

15. Let go of criticism and blame. Focus on what there is to appreciate about your mate, then honestly and spontaneously express your specific appreciation to them. It's also good to do this for yourself. - Judith Joyce, Life Coach

16. Never lose the fine art of dating. Setting aside a romantic evening on a regular basis can rekindle the magic of a long-term relationship. It doesn't have to be fancy, just special time for the two of you to remember how and why you first fell in love. - John Sovec, LMFT

17. Have regular times, even if it's just for 15 minutes, to check in on your relationship and what you appreciate about each other. No talk about kids, schedules, etc. allowed. - Mary Kay Aide, MS

18. Love your marriage by first taking care of yourself. So many of my patients say the reason their marriage fell apart is that they became depressed and disinterested in their partner. If you keep working on you, your marriage will stay fresh and vital. Start today by adding a new wedding vow to your list: Promise to take care of yourself so you will continue to age with grace and confidence by your partner's side. - Mary Jo Rapini, LPC

19. Recognize that your husband or wife is mirroring back to you who you are. So take whatever you're upset with him/her about and use it to help yourself look squarely at what you need to do in order to grow and evolve—the relationship will thrive! - Ilene Dillon, LCSW, LMFT

20. Take time to have some fun together every day! With today's hectic schedules, it's easy to find your marriage at the bottom of the priority list. Take a walk and hold hands (nature calms), couple-cook (food fight!), exercise together (tennis or dancing maybe?) or just collect a "Daily Joke" to share. It doesn't have to be expensive, but if you make the commitment and effort to laugh together as often as possible, it can sweeten your connection and cement your relationship for life. - Melodie Tucker, CPC

21. Before you get mad or assign blame, take a breath and ask your partner for his or her perspective. For instance, it's your spouse's job to walk the dog in the morning, but you discover dog poop on the kitchen floor and cleaning it up makes you late for work. Instead of immediately placing blame, saying something like, "I'm puzzled about what happened with Spot this morning," is a gentle way to start a conversation. - Jean Fitzpatrick. L.P

22. Make a list of three of the happiest moments in your marriage. Spend a few minutes each day briefly reliving those moments in your mind. The results will amaze you. - Lucia, Dating Coach

23. You can change your relationship for the better by increasing the use of the following statements: "I love you", "I'm here for you", "I understand", "I'm sorry", "Thank you", "I really appreciate all that you do", "It's so nice to see you", "That was quite an accomplishment!" - Gina Spielman

24. Appreciate your partner at least five times each day. Appreciate them from your heart about who they are at their essence. Leave gratitude in love notes, hide them so they will find them, or look deeply into their eyes and tell them. Be creative! - Linda Marie, RN, BSN

25. In order to keep the spark alive and avoid "roommate syndrome," couples have to understand the notion of spending "time" together versus creating "sacred" time together. Spending time at social events, time with family and doing "chores" together does not count as sacred time. Instead, carve out special time to not only be intimate, but also ensure that you continue to share new experiences together such as hiking, exploring someplace new, or arranging a stay-cation in your own city. - Marni Battista, CPC

26. Compliment your spouse everyday! A compliment is a sign of acknowledgment and appreciation. Make an effort to affirm your spouse's value in life, and in love. - Nicole Johnson, Dating and Relationship Coach

27. Create a clear vision of your shared future together. Sit down, listen to each other and write out how you want your future as a couple to look. It's much easier to create your best relationship together if both people's needs are voiced, heard and supported by their partner. - Eve Agee, PhD

28. Censor every impulse to blame or criticize your partner. Do everything you can to support your partner's well-being, and respect your partner as you would your best friend. - John Gerson, Ph.D

29. You need to date your mate. Date night is sacred and special and should be on the same day of the week every week. One week the wife should suggest the date idea and the husband should come up with the date night plan for the opposite week. This encourages both the husband and wife to be invested in date night. - Julie Spira, Dating and Relationship Coach

30. Learn and practice Tantra. - Judith Condon

31. Communication and time together are the keys to strengthening your marriage. Impossible to imagine one without the other! - Lori Edelson, LMSW, LMFT

32. One of the most important factors in a good marriage is respect. Respect each other, avoid verbal abuse, and keep insults to yourself. Bad words are just like squeezing toothpaste out of its tube — once it is out you can never get it back in again. - Georgia Panayi, MBA

33. Set aside 10 minutes a day to talk to your partner. Ask what her favorite movie is and why, ask him to recall a happy memory from childhood, ask her what she'd like to be remembered for, ask him to name the three worst songs of all time. Do it at dinner, before bed, or anytime—as long as you do it for 10 minutes every day. This simple change infuses relationships with new life. - Dr. Terri Orbuch, Ph.D

34. You can have control or you can have connection with your partner, but you can't have both. Pursue connection! - Lee Horton, Ph.D

35. Every week if possible, go out on a date just like you did before you were married. Select an activity where the two of you can interact, talk, and just be together enjoying each other's company (not a movie!). End your date in the bedroom. Works like a charm! - Ann Robbins, CRC

36. Couples often lose each other because of their busy lives: work, children, computers, and separate male/female activities. A healthy marriage is one that has a mix of individual, family, and couple time. The amount of each may be different for each couple, but the mix is necessary to keep a functional marriage. - Michele Seligman LCSW, BCD

37. Our brains are the only organ in the human body which do not self regulate, but need to be in connection with another brain for healing. Sit face-to-face and gaze into your lover's eyes in order to allow the limbic system to relax. This will bring you closer and create the deepest sort of intimacy. - Mary Kay Cocharo, LMFT

38. When you first see each other at the end of your respective days, before you do anything else, hold each other without speaking for at least 60 seconds. By doing so you remind each other's old/reptilian brains that you are a source of pleasure and comfort. It's simple, it's easy to do, and it will make a world of difference. - Laura Marshall, LCSW

39. Preface important communication with a simple yet effective introduction. Try: "Honey, I'm confused about your response to my plans for a weekend hunting trip with the guys. When would be a good time to talk further?" My relationship coaching clients have found that prefacing their remarks encourages a better, more accommodating reaction from their partner. - Greg R. Thiel, MA

40. On those ever-important date nights, remember to be a wife first and a critic second. Every time you open your mouth to complain about something — whether it's the food, the service, the movie, the weather, whatever — some part of your partner feels he's failing because you aren't having a great time. Men are happiest when they can please their woman! Save the full critique for your girlfriends and in meantime, let him see the best in you. - Delaine Moore, Dating and Relationship Coach

41. Lean in. When it gets hard in a relationship, our tendency is to protect ourselves, to retreat, to "lean out." Leaning out when your partner reaches out creates distance and dissonance. If instead you "lean in" to the uncomfortable feelings, to the unknown and your own vulnerability, and meet your partner, you can actually strengthen your relationship through the struggles you face together. - Christine Arylo, Life Coach

42. Accept your partner exactly as they are today. Don't try to change him/her. - Ellen Hartson

43. When your partner tells you something (about you) that is bothering him, reflect back what he is saying. When we "mirror", this helps us not feel as defensive and allows us the opportunity to better understand what he is trying to communicate. - Anne Crowley, Ph.D

44. The best way to strengthen a marriage is to support and assist each other in being the best you can be. A strong marriage is one in which both people understand that the other person needs to have outside interests and activities which help them to feel happy and fulfilled. A strong marriage is one where both people understand that it is more important to be happy than it is to be right. - Dr. Joe Amoia

45. Have you lost that loving feeling? Step 1: Write down 10 qualities you loved about your partner when you first met and read it to each other. Step 2: Brainstorm a list of 10 fun things you did together when you first met; do one date per week and enjoy bringing back that loving feeling! - Tasha Dimling, Dating Coach, MBA

46. You're entitled to the occasional bad mood. You're not entitled to make your partner the whipping boy. - Sherry Amatenstein, LCSW

47. A strong marriage is a partnership in trust. Trust your partner in everything, including purchases and financial decisions, and to bring up things with you that need a joint decision. If you can't do that, the two of you have a problem. - Donald Pelles, Ph.D., CHt

48. Always remember that life is long. In the heat of the moment, what feels super-important will likely fade in importance as time goes by. Before you react by yelling, tossing insults or unkind words, remember that "This, too, shall pass". In fact, recent studies have shown that even the most unhappiest of couples report being very happy five years later. So don't let one unfortunate incident, difficult argument or challenging moment destroy your lifetime of happiness. - Melanie Gorman, MA

49. A woman needs her partner to spend time giving her his full attention and looking directly into her eyes. When she receives this, she can easily get in touch with her feelings of love for her husband and becomes much more receptive to his needs. This is how intimacy can be fulfilling for both people ... magical even! - Linda Wiggins, Executive Director for RelationSync

50. Use character-related words that honor your spouse for such qualities as patience, helpfulness, courage, or kindness. Create regular opportunities for fun, laughter, and positive experiences. Figure out what communicates love to each other and do that. Be observant and thoughtful with little things and even do chores that the other dislikes. Consciously doing what opens and softens your spouse's heart will benefit you both in the long-run and keep your marriage happier.

35 Secrets to a Successful Marriage

For many married couples, falling in love and saying "I do" was the easy part. Living happily ever after is the part that takes a whole lot of work.

My family history doesn't have the best track record when it comes to the vow "until death do us part." My parents divorced when I was 18, and on my mom's side alone, not one single marriage has lasted (keep in mind, she's one of eight siblings). One might think this would make me a cynic when it comes to marriage — but for some unexplainable reason, that's not the case. Maybe I'm an idealist, but I think you can fall in love with your best friend, grow old together, and even live happily ever after.

I sought out some honest advice from real people who might have insight as to what makes a marriage stand the distance. I reached out to all the married couples and divorcées I knew and asked them the burning question, "What's the secret to making a marriage successful?" Read their words of wisdom below:

1. Share everything with each other. Most importantly, everything you are feeling. There is no way to be on common ground if you don't communicate how you're feeling.

2. Whatever bad stuff happens, remember this, too, will pass.

3. Affection breeds more affection. Touch each other, kiss each other good morning, and have plenty of sex (even when you're old!). It's too easy to get out of the habit, which makes you feel distant. Intimacy and physical affection really help keep you connected.

4. Children can be stressful, but they, too, will grow up.

5. Let the little things go and think big picture. Since you're in it for the long haul, are you really going to care who did or didn't run the dishwasher when you look back in 10 years? Remind yourself that your relationship is much, much bigger than any one minor incident.

6. Fill the fridge with his favorites — it's easy to do, so just do it.

7. Take time for yourself to do what you love, what makes you happy and gives you energy — being successful as a couple will only work if each of you is strong and fulfilled as an individual.

8. Avoid giving the silent treatment. Talk about things that bother you as soon as possible; don't let your emotions build up, because you'll likely explode.

9. Let go of hurts more easily, and try not to dwell on things that annoy you.

10. Don't be afraid to compromise. It sounds like a bad word and like you are giving up on your "ideals," but in reality it's about the push and pull of a relationship. Try rating how much you want something on a scale from one to 10 and have your partner do the same. So if eating out is a five for you and staying in is a nine for him, then you should stay in that night.

11. Don't take each other for granted. You have to work at it all the time.

12. Be spontaneous. Change things up every once in a while, whether that means a last-minute vacation or a card for no special occasion. Grand gifts and the smallest gestures can go a long way when you're with someone for a very long time.

13. Be nice! This can be harder than it seems sometimes, but remember that you (hopefully) love the person more than anyone else on the planet and you chose to marry them, so treat them with kindness.

14.Be patient. You both might grow together at different times and in different ways, so you need to give and take to make it last forever.

15. Celebrate when good things happen, and be expressive about it.

16. Find new things, new hobbies to do together like road biking, a cooking class, or starting a garden. It's just another reason to spend time together building your bond, and it keeps the excitement going.

 17. Marry someone you like killing time with.

18. Tell them what you need. As much as you want them to, they can't read minds. Tell them that you feel disconnected and that you want a day alone together or date night.

19. Speaking of date nights, go on them and have fun! It's important to set time alone regardless of how busy either gets — especially when you have kids. Even if you're overworked, overtired, or low on funds, it doesn't take much time or money to reconnect. It can be as simple as going for a walk or cooking dinner together.

20. Make a budget together. It's a great way to talk about your plans and dreams for the future and how to make them happen.

21. Surprise each other like you used to do when dating with special notes, small gifts, baking them a favorite recipe, or planning a weekend away. It lets the other person know you're still in love with them, and it makes you feel the love, too.

 22.On the other end, when your spouse does do something special for you, show appreciation. They may know that you think all those positive things, but it's nice to hear them out loud.

23. Build your partner up and support them to be all they can or want to be.

24. Take time to put yourself in your spouse's shoes before judging. You want to avoid unnecessary criticism or negativity as much as you can.

25.  Make each other laugh. Try not to take everything so seriously.

26. Communication is key. When your marriage hits certain speed bumps, remind yourself that when you come out on the other side, your relationship should be better and more evolved. Make sure the tough times lead to improvement, and if you keep making the same mistakes, reevaluate why.

27. Have couple friends but also your own friends who you hang out with on a regular basis, without your spouse.

 28. Be more generous with time and money.

29. Be happy yourself. If you're in a slump, there's a tendency to take it out on your spouse or want them to fix it. You have to fix yourself.

30. Don't get defensive. Try to come at things from a place of love and kindness, and don't assume you're being attacked.

 31.Trust and be trustworthy.

32. Try to always remember why you fell in love with your partner. Whether it was their sense of humor or ambition — always remind yourself.

33. Say "I love you," and tell your partner they look attractive.

34. Appreciate what you have and realize that marriages at times can be fragile and need to be taken care of.

35. Enjoy the NOW. Add a house, kids, etc. to the plate, and things just keep getting more complicated. Whatever phase you're in, embrace it and enjoy it.

The Ten Biggest Mistakes Women Make In A Relationship. - Romance

If you can get a handle on the things on this list, I guarantee 

you'll notice your relationship drastically change for the 

better. 

Here you go: 

1. Flipping out if he looks at or talks to another woman. It's a 

man's nature to look, getting on his case shows you're 

insecure, which is a huge turn-off. If you find yourself 

getting jealous whenever a woman is within his vicinity, you 

need to do an honest check in with yourself. At the root of it, 

there is either trust missing from the relationship or you need 

to build up your self-esteem. 

2. Not respecting his personal space. If he's in a bad mood or 

doesn't feel like talking, leave him alone and let it be. Most 

guys don't like to talk about their issues the way women do. 

They prefer to pull back and work things out internally. 

3. Not taking care of yourself or letting yourself go. It really 

is a shame to see how many women think it's okay to stop 

working out and shaving their legs as soon as they're in a 

relationship. If anything, you should feel more motivated to 

make the effort once things are more settled to keep the 

attraction alive and intimate energy buzzing. 

4. Not having your own life. Don't be one of those girls who 

forgets her friends and her interests as soon as she has a 

man, it never ends well. 

5. Being passive aggressive. Men are much more

straightforward than women, if you tell him nothing's wrong 

and then pout and mope around waiting for him to press you 

further, you'll just cause anger and resentment to build. Be 

honest and straightforward with him if you have an issue. 

6. Nagging. No guy is perfect, no man is capable of giving 

you every single thing you need. There will be times when 

you're not happy with something he's doing. If this happen, 

do not nag him over it. The best strategy is to tell him what it 

is you want (I love it when you do X) instead of harping on 

what you don't want (Why don't you ever do Y?) 

7. Not appreciating him. Again, stop looking at the things he 

isn't doing and look at what he is doing, and then 

acknowledge and appreciate him for it! The more you show 

you appreciate him, the more he'll try to please you. 

8. Being bitter/whiny/grouchy. We all have bad days, it's 

understandable. However, it's in your best interest to try and 

be happy and positive. No one wants to hang around with a 

negative Nancy. In general, we're drawn to people who are 

happy and radiate a positive energy. 

Wake up with a smile, express gratitude, see the good in your 

life and in your relationship. This will not only help you in 

your relationships, but it will make your life better overall. 

9. Dumping your insecurities onto him. It's not his fault if 

you feel fat or your skin is breaking out or you found a tiny 

wrinkle by your mouth, these are your issues and hang ups 

so don't turn them into relationship problems.

 If he's with you, it's a given that he finds you attractive. Don't 

talk him out of his attraction by highlighting all your flaws. 

Chances are he won't even notice these things until you point 

them out, so why draw attention to them? Men are attracted to 

confident women so not only will you be making him a ware 

of your flaws, you'll be diminishing his overall attraction to 

you. 

10. Trying to change him. When you get into a relationship, 

you need to take that person for exactly who he is, not who 

you want him to be. He is who he is, take it or leave it. 

When it comes to minor things, like the fact that he wears 

running shoes with dress pants, be gentle and encouraging. 

Don't criticise and make him feel silly. Say something that 

makes him feel good and inspires him to make that change 

on his own, for instance "You look really sexy in that outfit 

but it would be even sexier with those loafers instead." 

Lots Of Love.

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What The Cost Of Your Engagement Ring Says About Your Marriage

The say a diamond is forever -- but new research suggests the bigger the diamond engagement ring, the shorter the marriage might be.

Economics professors from Emory University surveyed 3,000 U.S. adults who had been married at some point in their lives and found that participants who spent large sums of money on engagement rings and/or their weddings were more likely to end up divorced.

Here are the two main findings:

1. Men who spent $2,000 to $4,000 on engagement rings were 1.3 times more likely to end up divorced than men who spent $500 to $2,000. Women who received expensive engagement rings also experienced higher rates of divorce.

2. Women whose weddings cost $20,000 or more were 3.5 times more likely to end up divorced than women who spent $5,000 to $10,000. (According to The Knot, the average cost of a wedding in the U.S. is $30,000).

Interestingly, spending $1,000 or less on the wedding decreased the chances of divorce, but spending too little on an engagement ring backfired; those who spent less than $500 experienced higher rates of divorce.

The authors of the paper hypothesize that the correlation between high wedding and engagement ring costs and divorce may have to do with financial stress placed on brides and grooms who are determined to have the perfect day, whether or not they can actually afford it.

For example, women whose rings cost over $2,000 were three times more likely to complain about stress related to wedding debt. On the other hand, those who spent less than $1,000 on their weddings were 82 to 93 percent less likely to be stressed out by wedding finances.

It makes sense that spending an exorbitant amount on a wedding or engagement ring without being able to afford it could cause unnecessary financial stress, so why do it?

The researchers place some blame on the wedding industry for creating a new standard over the past fifty years through ad campaigns, magazines and inflated costs that encourage brides and grooms to spend, spend, spend.

They had this to say about engagement rings:

"Our findings provide little evidence to support the validity of the wedding industry’s general message that connects expensive weddings with positive marital outcomes," the study states.

But don't call off your large nuptials just yet. The researchers found that having more guests -- not spending more money -- led to longer marriages, as did having a honeymoon (even an inexpensive one!)

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Courtesy: Campus Watch....

Wise Pieces of Advice from Grandparents

Nowadays many young people resent the pieces of advice given by their grandparents. If you open your eyes and think broader, you’ll understand that these words are real pearls of wisdom. I’m sure that Google or other search engines won’t give you all valuable and frank information, but your grandparents are mega experienced people in your life who really want to help you become happy and avoid fatal mistakes. These two precious human beings are always ready to give you everything for you to reach your goals and make your cherished dreams come true. It is necessary to pay attention to their wise words.

Unfortunately, my dear grandparents are gone, but they are always alive in my heart. When I visit their tombs, my heart fills with sentimentalism and I recollect their pearls of wisdom with a tear in my eyes. Now their sacred words have become the main principles of my life. I wish I understood these truths earlier. Check out a few wise pieces of advice from grandparents.

1. Don’t burn bridges

This huge world is actually small and interconnected. Don’t burn bridges, no matter how tempted you might be, because you never know how many times you’ll have to cross the same river. My grandparents explained to me that I should always try to stay in good relations with people I know, because once I’ll have to cooperate with them again. Now I realize that this wonderful advice is the key to building a good reputation in society. Furthermore, it often happens that people you dislike or hate due to some failures from the past can help you more than those who seem to be your best friends.

2. The fire of burned bridges may light your way to success

My grandfather was a businessman and he had a bit different view on life. He believed that bad bridges need to be burned in order to get rid of negativity and enemies who keep you away from you happiness. I do agree that there’s no point in continuing a negative relationship once you’re out the door. If the person has already shown the true face, you should be sure that nothing will change for better. I can burn bridges when I feel that I’m ill-used or humbled by somebody, because I prefer to stick to my life moto, “I never sacrifice three things: my family, my heart and my dignity.” I truly believe that burned bridges will light my way to growth and happiness.

3. Keep money for rainy days

Life is an unpredictable thing and you never know when the sun will come out again to cover you with the sunshine. When I was young I couldn’t manage my money properly. Consequently, I had quarrels with my mum. My grandparents were the only people who gave a helping hand if necessary. Moreover, they taught me to keep some money for the rainy days in spite of stable incomes. Today, I realize that it’s impossible to disregard this old truth, especially if you have a family.

4. Laugh as much as possible

Nowadays smiles and laughter are the best medicine from stress and pain. I find humor unique because it’s absolutely free and you cannot buy a frank and funny laughter. You can easily improve your mood and help others to smile in return. It’s surprising, but laughter is infectious, because many people cannot resist the sound of a roaring laughter. Smiles often bind people together and bring their minds and bodies into a balance. Plus, humor lightens your burdens and increases intimacy and happiness. My grandpa always taught me to use laughter and smiles as the best diplomatic trick to handle difficult situations. I want to admit that it really works.

5. Love and enjoy your kids

Children are the most beautiful flowers of your life. My granny always told that I should spend more time with my kids since time flies really fast. That’s why it’s better to slow down, because your kids will never be as little as they are right this moment. Moreover, children are the reflection of their parents, so you should do your best to make your child an all-rounded and happy person. Try to treat these words seriously, because in the blink of an eye, your kids will have babies of their own. Enjoy the moment, life and your wonderful kids.

6. Crying

My dear grandma advised me to cry when I was disappointed about something. Once I’ve tried and now I realize that crying is an essential part of my mental well-being. Crying is not the sign of your weakness, but the ability to feel and experience different emotions. It releases stress hormones and toxins from your body. Furthermore, it gives relief to your heart and soul.

7. Do your favorite things

My grandparents always taught me to be brave enough to follow my dreams. I support the idea that the love to do things you adore cannot be forced. It’s desirable to find things you are passionate about and develop in this direction. My grandpa wanted to be a driver, but his parents forbade and forced him to continue their business. Consequently, he was one of the most successful businessmen in the state, but once he confessed that he would have been happier to work as a driver.

I hope these pearls of wisdom given by my (and maybe your) grandparents will help you somehow. Surely, every family has its own secrets and recipes on how to find happiness in this harsh world. Respect your family traditions and don’t forget about your grandparents who love you so much. What pearls of wisdom have you learned from your grandparents?